I Can’t Deal With Unwanted Attention

My blog is by no means a relationship feed or filled with articles about boys. I am no Carrie Bradshaw and have no intention to be.
I think I have made it clear on this site that I am destined to be spinster. Especially seeing as I am terrified of commitment and much rather spend time with my friends discussing cats or fictional characters.
I make my need for a relationship clear in real life. With men and women alike, saying that I don’t see myself in a relationship and can’t stand the effort of other people beyond friendship.
But why oh why do guys think that I am not being serious. Why do they think my insults is flirting? Why must they put me on an awkward situation?

I appreciate men who friendzone me and I friendzone them, being friends and understand the boundaries. But some boys think that if I refer to them as a buddy and thinl that they should flirt anyway. My body is not capable of flirting, my childish face, bad hair and chubby stomach screams unattractive. I’m not trying to not look good but it happens.

The experience that spurred this one was that one “friend” who I haven’t seen in a few months, started to be more awkward than usual. In the past I have spoken about girls that he may like and my views on relationships so it’s pretty clear that I don’t want any unnecessary attention. In general I tend to have awkward reactions to very explicit conversations. Today in particular he singled me out of my friends and sat a little to close to comfort. Asked me about things that I haven’t told him, so clearly seen via snap chat months ago. He chose to spend time sitting with me than with his own friends until I told him that he should go. But not before hearing my friend mention something about my bra size under her breath. To which he continued to pester me about which size I really was. I told him very clear that I wasn’t gonna tell him but he made remarks that he wasn’t gonna quit. He then returned and mentioned about it again. My friends just made jokes that they were right that he wasn’t a friend and just an awkward fuckboy.

I haven’t noticed before but I’ve been told many times that he’s checked me out head to toe when my back is turned. Also the fact that he only greets my group of friends when I’m around. Which he makes an effort to sit next to me even asking me to move my belongings and make space for him. The worst thing is when he tries to touch my feet cos I put my legs on the table (with shoes obviously. But it’s still weird.)

People would probably just say if you were attracted to him it would be different. And to that I would say maybe. I haven’t been attracted to a real person I’ve met since I was 13 and I only fall for people with a personality to match mine and I need to know someone very very well before I get those romantic feelings. And I hate that he thinks he knows me well. The reason I’m not attracted to him is because of him. His face is decent and I can see if people are attracted to him but thinking about his face makes me feel sick.

I wanna be nice but don’t wanna give out the wrong impression. I’m done with the inappropriate comments, kissy faces and the touching.

The main reason I wrote this is because I feel weird but at the same time feel like I’m over exaggerating.
Why do guys flirt with friends? Or am I just being too sensitive?

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4 Comments

  1. There are really annoying guys out there who are so full of themselves! I sometimes feel that way too. I hate being the center of attention of everyone. I don’t know. I don’t like the extra attention that people around me are giving me most of the time. 😪

    • Thanks for the reply. I understand what you mean about not being the centre of attention. I know many people who love to be noticed and get a thrill of guys flirting like this but I don’t understand it. So glad I’m not the only one 😛

  2. I think the worst part of it is that they make us feel like we did something wrong because we refused their advances. It’s called harassment and too often women feel like they are making a big deal out of nothing, maybe they are even told that, but anything that makes you feel uncomfortable or fear for your safety is not right and not your fault. I was like you at one point. I didn’t want a commitment to anyone. I never wanted to get married. I couldn’t take care of myself well, let alone anyone else. I look back now and think of how wonderful those days were that I stuck to my guns and followed my own heart. I’ve now been married for 20 years though. Never thought it would happen to me. Men are creatures unto themselves. Best stick with friends that respect your boundaries.

    • Thankfully it has all stopped now. Just continual ignoring but I know this isn’t the case for everyone.
      I know not all men are the same and glad you found someone to spend a good 20 years with. Thanks for the comment 🙂

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