Can’t Help But Be Mad

So that sadness I constantly felt, well, awesome news: I’ve graduated from that feeling. However, now I have transcended to being angry. I can’t help but be pissed off with everything. If in the past people have thought that I have no have patience for others, then they should see me now. 

I loved university.. for the first 2 years. now nothing makes me happier than the thought of leaving. Maybe it’s not being pissed all the time but having no time for other people’s bullshit. 

Scenario: the person your friend liked who you never liked and you know he acted like a fucking idiot toward her, approaches us. They’re talking they have some flirty vibe and you point blank say, “all the guys in this uni fucking suck.” Then look at him straight in the eye. I actually dont have a problem with men, at all, however i would have confessed to a murder if that would mean he left. Obviously not even my friends appreciated that but I still dont regret saying that to him. 

I’m so angry that it would be easier if people found me stand-offish and would rather walk away from the little ball of hate.

Scenario dos: the person you dealt with for a year but really don’t like becomes to much for you. This girl constantly trying to buddy her way to my friends but is still rude to them. I have had enough and feel like I didn’t need to deal with it for any longer so I stopped. The way when they talk about her I just try to stop it in an obvious way and they say “wow you really hate her.” Most of the time I just say what theyre all thinking yet it blows up in my face. Being honest isn’t enough for people. 

My mum always tells me that being blunt is my problem. “You can say the nicest thing yet if someone says something meaner but with a sweeter attitude they will prefer what the other person said.” 

I cant help but be angry. I don’t know what it is. 

I am always the bad guy. When people say they are the protagonist in their own life, I somehow still turn out to be the villain in mine.

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Never Be Sad Alone

I think I’m sick of shouting into the void
Only hearing my own echo once again
A lost soul that returns back to a shell which has been destroyed
I guess that’s the end then.

I don’t know why I’ve felt quite down lately but I tried looking into just talking to people. I called some friends but can’t bug them all the time so was looking at people to talk to online.
In the end I feel like my problems mean nothing but it’s hard for people who do need help. So if you’re reading this and you are a poor lost soul then you can talk to me. I don’t know who reads this but I want this to be a safe space. I don’t care if you think your problems aren’t big but if it’s enough to upset you then please drop your email and I’ll reply.