One Last Goodbye

Tears may fall from them,

But my grief cannot be seen,

I watch as they mourn.

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October Writing Challenge: Day 15

In a word: escapism. I like not thinking about what ever has me feeling down. I avoid problems. 

So when I feel down, I binge watch something. Read a book. Browse online. What makes me feel better is not thinking about things. When I feel like the problem is small enough or I acquire some courage to deal with it then I do but only after I’ve avoided the problem for a long enough time and possibly made it worse. I just like to step back and think about it.

I would like to just escape from my problems constantly. So escapism is there but it’s not the solution. For a while you can have problems that aren’t yours, you know it doesn’t affect you. There’s no consequences and no risk. It’s good for a while. At the very least. 

October Writing Challenge: Day 7


In ten years? Mate I don’t even know where I wanna be next week.
I guess I hope to be happy, healthy. I wanna finish writing one book, at the very least. 

I want to experience all new things. I want to travel.

I’d hope to gain professional success too. 

I would love to not be so awkward and be at ease with people. Be confident and don’t overthink.

Enjoy things more. 

So in the end, in ten years all I can do is hope for the best and do all I can by then. 

October Writing Challenge: Day 4

Nowadays any view is controversial. I don’t think brexit is the end of the world as we know it, the market will adapt. I believe in a greater being but will never force that on anyone else. 

I don’t have any really strong opinions on anything. Gay marriage. I’ve never had to make an opinion as it hasn’t affected me personally. Euthanasia. It’s important to remember that there’s all kind of different situations so I remain impartial.

I’m against fur. But I eat meat. 

I’m torn on the death penalty (leaning towards for). There’s some pretty shitty people out there. 

I don’t agree with guns at all. 

Gaza needs help. Syria. Burma. 

There’s a lot of things to have opinions about. Sometimes they don’t need to have reason. Other times you must have an argument prepared. But it’s important to know where to draw the line. Just be respectful to people. Your opinions and thoughts shouldn’t be harmful to others. 

Thanks for reading. (And comment below if you agree/disagree with anything I’ve said.)

The 30-Day Writing Challenge: Day 4

Day 4: Imagine that your protagonist has just turned into a statue. Describe his or her thoughts.

 

It’s the strangest feeling being completely immobilised. My mind was still functioning but the idea that my brain was sending signals to my body only to remain completely still. It was as if I was asleep, yet too aware of my surroundings. My eyes were locked on a singular point on the wall and I couldn’t even blink.

After the fear of paralysis or even death, I began to think more mundane thoughts. Giving up hope of trying to move gave an odd sense of perspective. I decided to focus on the now. Not my life, simply just my day.
Did I remember to turn off the iron?
Is there enough food for the cat to get by for a while?
Will Carrie and Mr Big end up together?
Clearly, these were questions of high importance (I can still joke).

My thoughts couldn’t help but wonder. Everything I’ve done in my life being completely futile. It all leading up to this. I worked my whole life wanting to help people, and I had yet to do this. I wanted to make a change. A peculiar selfishness occurred to me: was I doing it to make myself better? I was no saint; could it merely be an excuse to make me feel better about myself. So many dreams left to dream about, the chances not taken. All the plans I once had for myself only for me to end up like this.

I didn’t dare think about my family. Wondering if I would ever see them again, contemplating if there will be a time I can tell them that I love them one last time. Thank them.
Another distressing thought was that even if they find me I would need to watch them feeling sorry for me. They wouldn’t know that I could hear them, and I would be unable to reach out to them.
I’d just wonder for days on end if my mind would falter alongside my body, if I stopped thinking then there was a possibility that I could be forever lost. Stuck in the prison of my own vegetative state.

I heard a familiar voice of someone I know coming from behind me, their voice quickly trembled. Despite that fact that my back was facing them. their voice revealed all. They tried calling my name and eventually walked in front of me, glaring at me. They didn’t know what they were looking at yet a sadness still struck them as they fell to the ground.
My eyes began to stung and, much to my surprise, I could feel a dampness fall to my cheeks.